Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Same Song, Second Verse

I sure hope we're not warming up for the second verse. 

Almost three weeks ago I noticed a lymph node on the left side of my neck. It was new, and it didn't have a matching lymph node on the right side (I like symmetry). I was on antibiotics at the time for something else and waited to see if maybe the lymph node was related. It didn't go away. Thankfully, I had a regular 3 month appointment already scheduled with my oncologist for blood work, port flush, etc.

My doctor could feel it, too. He wasn't overly concerned - but is being cautious. He said it was probably too small to get an accurate read from a PET scan and that if I hadn't already had cancer, he wouldn't think anything of it. But since I have, he ordered a CT scan of my neck and scheduled an appointment with my surgeon for biopsy.

I know the greatest chance of relapse with my aggressive lymphoma is in the first two years. It's been less than 15 months since I finished treatment. I also know it relapses in about 1/3 of patients.

I know chances are good (hmmm, maybe not the best word) that my indolent lymphoma will relapse, especially since it's not even considered curable.

And so I've tried to prepare myself that I will probably deal with cancer again... and that I'll be okay with it.

However, on our way to my appointment, I decided I do NOT want to keep singing that song! 

But it's not really about me, is it? It's about God using me for HIS GLORY!!!

I think I'll go back and start at the beginning of my blog so I can be reminded (in writing) of how God was...and is...with us every step of the way!

My soul finds rest in God alone; 
my salvation comes from him.  
He alone is my rock and my salvation; 
He is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

~ Psalm 62:1-2

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