Friday, June 28, 2013

PET scan

I had my PET scan after finishing my scheduled chemo treatments to see if the lymphoma is gone. I was far less nervous this time than with my first PET scan. I listened to one of the Passion albums while waiting for the radioactive stuff to go through my body. I had a comfy recliner and a warm blanket in a dark and quiet room for about 45 minutes. During the actual PET scan I just closed my eyes and starting praising God for all the wonderful things He's done during this journey - my own spiritual growth, support from family and friends, great doctors and nurses, minimal side effects, safety in all of our travel back and forth to Tulsa, insurance coverage, etc, etc, etc. It was a great time to be totally focused on God. I may have dozed a little bit, too!

I've been thinking about the results of the PET scan while we wait for my doctor's appointment. Obviously, we're praying it's totally CLEAR. But what if it's not??? Thankfully, God is God, God is good, and God is faithful no matter what we find out from the scan results. I love that there are so many songs that remind us of God's goodness and faithfulness, and I'm thankful for Christian radio stations like KLOVE. There are so many great artists writing and singing great songs that can make me lift up my hands in praise, shed a tear, or sometimes both at the same time! I've noticed that through my lymphoma journey, many songs have taken on a whole new meaning. I don't know if I'm really hearing the words for the first time or if they are just more fitting now - probably both!

One song that has touched me is "Even If" by Kutless. The words are hard to sing when praying for healing, because what if the healing doesn't come? My prayer is to be able to sing the words to this song with all sincerity regardless of the results of my PET scan!

Sometimes all we have to hold on to
Is what we know is true of who You are
So when the heartache hits like a hurricane
That could never change who You are
And we trust in who You are

Even if the healing doesn't come

And life falls apart
And dreams are still undone
You are God You are good
Forever faithful One
Even if the healing
Even if the healing doesn't come

Lord we know your ways are not our ways

So we set our faith in who You are
Even though You reign high above us
You tenderly love us
We know Your heart
And we rest in who You are

You're still the Great and Mighty One

We trust You always
You're working all things for our good
We'll sing your praise

You are God and we will bless You

As the Good and Faithful One
You are God and we will bless You
Even if the healing doesn't come
Even if the healing doesn't come

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